It’s started yesterday, I just suddenly missed my dad. Yesterday morning was like any other Saturday. I woke up pretty early, went to Shoprite, as usual, came home and unpacked the groceries with Samantha. I remember walking back to my car from putting the cart in the cart corral and thinking, “I miss him.” It pretty much struck me out of nowhere.
After Samantha and I put the groceries away I went to my other usual haunt, the thrift store, I scored some ridiculously high priced Italian denim for 6.99 and a top for the fall, but that was about it. But driving home I thought about Daddy. I called my mom and we talked for a while. The weather was crazy hot this weekend so it wasn’t an outdoor weekend for us. I wanted to treasure hunt at TJ Maxx so Samantha came along. 2 hours later I wanted to exclaim, “it was a shopper’s sky at TJ Maxx!” Whenever I went shopping and had a great trip, daddy would say loudly that is was a “shopper’s sky!” wherever I just came from. I did have a great shopping trip to TJ Maxx and daddy would have appreciated it.
I want to tell him so many things. He would love that Alyssa is engaged and be just as proud and happy as we are of both Alyssa and Sam. I want to tell him about the motorcycle I’m riding now, that it’s smaller than the Sportster we bought first and that it’s red. I wonder what Daddy’s reaction would have been to this pandemic we’re in the midst of. He would have been very high risk due to fighting cancer and having had lung surgery in the past. I want to tell him about me working at the enrichment center in Brooklyn this summer; about the kids and my co workers. How nice the staff is and how school safety takes their job seriously yet they make the time to be fun and break our chops every morning.
There’s so much more I want to tell him. I could write pages as I’m sure anyone reading this who has lost a loved one could. I know daddy is with Jesus, we had a talk about faith before he was diagnosed again with cancer. I wear the cross I bought him, he asked me to get him one after we talked about Jesus and faith. I was so happy to do that for him. I miss my Dad.